And It's Freakin' Staying Off

OK, so maybe cell phones aren't killing bees, and maybe those popcorn-popping cell phone videos are totally faked, but guess what cell phones are doing? They're giving you fucking brain tumors!

This shit is fucked up, yo. The report was kicked off ten years ago...

...but its full publication has been held up for years. Components of this study published to date reveal what the authors call a 'systemic-skew', greatly underestimating brain tumor risk.

The design flaws include categorizing subjects who used portable phones (which emit the same microwave radiation as cellphones,) as 'unexposed'; exclusion of many types of brain tumors; exclusion of people who had died, or were too ill to be interviewed, as a consequence of their brain tumor; and exclusion of children and young adults, who are more vulnerable.

That's right. People in the study who died of brain tumors were taken out of the statistics because, you know, they were fucking dead.

Anyway, even just a quick skim of the report (downloadable from the link above) will freak your shit out.

It freaked my shit out, and I keep my goddamned cell phone off at all times. If I get a brain tumor, I'm gonna be pretty pissed off at all you cell phone users.

I found the link at HuffPo, and it freaked out the missus, too.