Thursday, May 07, 2009

Hey, As Long As You Don't Hurt Anyone

This Middle-Name-Joe The Not-Even-a-Licensed Plumber doesn't seem to go away, and I gotta say, the media on the left is even more fascinated by this tool than the right. Christ! Look at me! I'm wasting valuable space on the Dickhead, too.

I guess we can file him under the "bald" part of B&E. But let's not start thinking that all bald people are alike now. Easy there, baldists.

Anyway, I'm not gonna bother to link to any stories about "Joe the Plumber," but he apparently told Time Magazine that he's leaving the Republican Party.

Marketing people will often create a user profile for their archetypal consumer. So, for example, Victoria's Secret has created "Nicky." Nicky isn't a real person, but she personifies everything that the Victoria's Secret brand sells to. The idea is that the more specific you get with a user profile, the better you can sell to your target customer.

Joe the Plumber is that archetypal consumer for the Republican Party. And he just happened to come to life during the last election. So what are you left with, then, when your archetypal consumer rejects you? Well, you're sort of fucked.

And as the Republican Party is deserted in droves by all the Joe-the-Plumbers, Tito-the-Builders, and Chad-the-Douches, they're left with no one to sell to. Companies with no one to sell to end up bankrupt. The Republican Party has been morally bankrupt for a long time, and now they're actually losing the people smack-dab in the middle of their target audience. They are morally and physically bankrupt.

Joe-the-Archetype isn't going to turn to the Democratic Party. And why would he? Hell, I'm not being given any major reasons from the Democratic leadership to support them either, and I agree with the official stance of the Party on a fair number of issues facing our nation today.

So what happens to these Joe-the-Whackjobs? Who cares? As long as they don't hurt anybody.

Which, frankly, seems pretty unlikely. After all, look at Joe-the-Homophobe's views on gay people. Apparently, yesterday he said that he wouldn't let any queers near his children. And like most bigots, he was quick to point out that he was friends with actual homosexuals. I'm sure most of you have heard (or perhaps even said) something along the lines of "I'm not prejudice! Some of my best friends are black/gay/Jewish/women/Ewoks/children!"

Anyway, it's a downright dangerous point-of-view. It's not any sort of giant leap to go from "stay away from my kids" to "I fucking told you I'd fucking kill you if you didn't stay away from my kids!" if the gay person in question suddenly finds himself within Joe's unacceptable circle of proximity to his children.

But Joe-the-Dickhead claims that these actual homosexual friends know where he stands about having them nowhere near his children.

I'm going to go out on a real limb here: if Joe-the-Plumber actually knows any gay people well (which I doubt) and these actual gay people actually know that he won't let them near his kids, these gay people don't consider Joe-the-Plumber a friend. Unless these are some seriously self-loathing gay people.

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At 11:58 PM , Anonymous curt(bald bro said...

the only reason i can think of to be homophobic is if yer still in the closet and haven't come to grips with it (otherwise, why in the world would u give a fuck what 2 consenting adults do in the privacy of their bedroom?!


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