Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Now We Just Need Him to Get a New Nickname

Dude! The Mets have an agreement with Francisco Rodriguez! He's like a top-of-the-line closer! We're talking about a real pitcher in the bullpen! As opposed to this past year, when the Mets had nothing in their bullpen at all!

I really hate his nickname. K-Rod. Fucking stupid. K-Rod. Get it?? You see, there's this ballplayer named Alex Rodriguez, who has the nickname A-Rod. But Francisco Rodriguez is a pitcher, and in the score book, a strikeout is recorded as a "K," and since he strikes out a lot of people, he's K-Rod. That's right: his nickname is actually referential to a guy who plays for the team across town. Plus, it's fucking stupid.

But I feel pretty good about getting that arm in a Mets uniform.

Best of all, even after Frankie's salary, there's still $8 million a year left from the Citigroup sponsorship, now being guaranteed by the United States Government!

Between that and all the tax breaks and government bonds and public financing the new stadiums is getting, we've got ourselves a genuine socialist ballclub here in Queens.

Power to the people! Power to the Mets! Power to the people! Power to the Mets!

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