What Stood Out This Week - 5/4-5/10

Is it over? It's over. But is it over over? Let's see What Stood Out This Week.

The Republican

John McCain got himself in the news a little bit this week, doing more than just letting his Democratic rivals pummel each other while he masturbated from the sidelines. On "The Daily Show" McCain once again discussed Obama's endorsement by Hamas. Obama accused him of "losing his bearings" with such attacks. The McCain Campaign accused Obama of using that phrase deliberately, injecting age into the race. I'm not sure that he was, McCain Campaign, but thanks for reminding us how fucking old John McCain is.

Cindy McCain says she will never ever ever ever ever, not in a million years release her tax returns. She's like Mitt Romney rich and is very private about it. Plus it's important no one ever finds out just how much John benefited from her extreme wealth. DUDE, IT'S TOTALLY EXTREME WEALTH! WOO-HOO!

Oh, and McCain may not have voted for Bush in 2000.

The Democrats

Barack Obama trounced in North Carolina; Hillary Clinton won a squeaker in Indiana. And news broke of a $6.4 million personal loan from the Clintons to the Clinton campaign. Thus endeth Hillary's claim on momentum. And even though it clearly (finally) spoke the end of Hillary's campaign, she soldiers on, like we all knew she would.

Her latest acts of desperation include, but are not limited to, the following:

- Trying to change the official delegate count. Now when Obama reaches the threshold of 2,025 to claim the nomination, she can still say he's got another 200 to go.

- Race-baiting. She's done well among working class white folks, and she called them "hard-working people, white people." Because, you see, the black folks of the Democratic Party are lazy bums. And we over-educated white people are just a bunch of effete elitists, like Hillary. But to be fair to myself, I wasn't born with nearly the privilege that she was. Anyway, race-baiting is ugly, Hillary, and shame on you.

So the question becomes, "What's her new agenda?" Now that the math has made it impossible for Hillary (Obama has overtaken her lead in superdelegates as well), what is she running for?

A generous possibility

Hillary's very likely going to win the West Virginia and Kentucky contests coming up. It would look better for the Democratic Party if Obama lost to Hillary rather than to no one. So maybe she's staying in to make Obama look better! Hello? Anyone? No?

A few more likely possibilities

1) Hillary's campaign is massively in debt - to her personally and to others. Maybe as much as $25 million in debt. Obama could pay that shit off today if she asked. It's a tricky proposition, though. A lot of Obama supporters wouldn't like it much, especially since so much of the debt is owed to Hillary's head Dickhead Mark Penn. Still, there could be some behind the scenes maneuvering to get the debt paid off in return for a graceful exit (if that's even possible at this point).

2) Hillary's angling for a leadership position of some sort. The most obvious, of course, would be Vice President. I'd be surprised if that's what she wants, though. The Vice President has traditionally been totally isolated from the administration it serves (Gore and Cheney being recent exceptions, but exceptions nonetheless). The Nation featured an online article stating that if Hillary's VP Obama should name Chelsea official food taster. Gee, it's almost like people expect anything from the Clintons. And I'd be very surprised if Obama would want Hillary as his VP anyway. I could see that being a deal-breaker.

So if not VP what other possibilities are there? Senate Majority Leader? Supreme Court Justice (when some of those old liberals retire/die)? Secretary of State? I actually think that Hillary would be a hell of a Senate Majority Leader, and maybe Harry Reid would even take a dive on behalf of party unity.

3) She's running for 2012. Maybe her goal is to make Obama such a broken candidate that he won't win in 2008, and she'll be able to run again in 2012. I'd like to think that even the Clintons aren't this devious, but the longer this primary drags out the more sense it makes to me.

A Quitter

John Edwards voted this past week in the North Carolina primary, and wouldn't say for whom he voted. But he may have slipped up, referring to the recipient of his vote as "him." On the other hand, it could've been his Southern drawl, using the plural pronoun them to replace the singular neuter candidate and shortened to 'em. If he and Elizabeth can agree on an endorsement, they'll go public soon. I'm guessing they split their votes.

There you go: McCain focuses on Obama; Obama focuses on McCain; and Hillary continues to attack Obama.

And that's What Stood Out This Week.