Nothing Satisfies Like Jayson

I got a rare seat on the downtown number 5 train this morning and found myself in front of a homemade ad for Jayson the Massage Therapist.


I've doctored the photo only to get rid of the phone number. Other than that, it is exactly as I saw it.

But Jayson, I have some questions and comments for you:

First of all, Jayson, you need to think about your advertising strategy. Who is your target audience? Gay men? Lonely ladies? Anyone? I'm not sure who your target consumer is.

Second, you're not leaving a lot to the imagination. Sometimes, Jayson, the mind can conjure a better image than an image itself. Something to think about, Jayson.

Also, I'm surprised you have a 914 number. That's Westchester County, Jayson. I'm surprised and impressed, frankly.

Oh, Jayson... Has someone played a joke on you?

(By the way, the woman who saw me taking this photo on the subway this morning moved slowly away from me.)