Monday, December 05, 2005

Dickhead of the Week - Condoleeza Rice

Originally uploaded by dangunderman.
For months I've assumed she would be the first female DotW, and Condoleeza Rice has finally made it official. "Long Grain" gave a speech to the Euros filled with semi-veiled threats and insults to Europe's collective intelligence.

Europe says, "Who the hell do you think you are holding suspects in secret prisons in our country?" Arborio says, "Hey, Eurotrash motherfuckers. Don't criticize things you can't possibly understand."

Europe asks, "Why do you need to do such abhorrent things?" Uncle Ben's replies, "This is for your own good, and believe me, it hurts me worse than it hurts you."

Europe says, "We don't like you or your methods." Basmati says, "OK, then. I mean, if you want us to cut you off, well, don't come crying to us next time you get blown up. Especially if we found out that exact information while pulling out the toenails of a terrorist."

Well done, Condi Rice Pudding, you are B&E's first female Dickhead of the Week. And yes, I purposefully avoided referring to you as "Brown."



At 5:13 PM , Anonymous Virgil said...

Uncle Ben came close, though...

At 12:47 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

she may be brown on the outside, but we all know she's white rice on the inside

At 5:16 PM , Blogger Ted Carter said...

And she's so good at putting on that happy face, too.


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