Dickhead of the Week - Ted Stevens

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Originally uploaded by dangunderman.

Congratulations to Alaska Senator Ted Stevens, who gets his second Dickhead of the Week Award. Taking the compassion out of compassionate conservatism, Teddy has threatened to resign if any of the money from the fatty transportation bill is taken from his pet projects (including the "Bridge to Nowhere") to help rebuild New Orleans. And he insists that he's not bluffing.

Four villages in northern Alaska are making plans to evacuate, as the Arctic melts and waters rise, and yet Teddy refuses to acknowledge global warming, and has been fighting for years to open up the Arctic refuge to drilling, a fight he seems poised finally to win. He's also a major proponent of extending the reach of the FCC to cover cable and even satellite radio and television. Seriously, this guy's a real Dickhead.

As president pro tempore of the Senate, Ted's third in the line of succession after the VP and Speaker of the House. So, uh, why aren't we graciously accepting his resignation and adding about a half billion dollars to the Gulf Coast recovery effort?

In other Alaska political news... Alaskan Congressman Don Young, this week's Runner-Up Dickhead, upon hearing that many of his constituents would rather help the people of New Orleans than build a useless bridge, responded with the empathetic words, "They can kiss my ear. That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard."