I Want To Be Left Behind

Armageddon_it
Originally uploaded by dangunderman.

Most of you know about the Left Behind franchise. For those of you who don't, a summary...

The Left Behind franchise is a series of books and movies that take place immediately after the rapture. The rapture, for you heathens that will be burning in hell, is the event near the End of Times when the faithful are instantaneously zapped up to heaven by the Gentle Hand of God. The unclean faithless, i.e. those "left behind," are then treated to vast quantities of war, chaos, and Anti-Christitude, usually portrayed to look something like the picture here.

A number of those Left Behind recognize their errant ways and become faithful after the rapture. While it's too late for them to get zapped up to heaven by the Gentle Hand of God, they battle the Forces of Satan on Earth, all while also turning as many faithless as possible into faithful. Ultimately, I think they save their own asses and weasel their way back into the good graces of the Lord Above.

Kirk Cameron stars in the movies. There have been at least two so far.

The Left Behind franchise is a gazillion dollar, self-perpetuating enterprise, read and/or seen by right-wing nuts and supported by a gaggle of religious leaders and communities.

But I think they've got the whole premise wrong. The most close-minded, hateful, and selfish people on this earth are the right-wing Christians. I mean, if the rapture happens, and suddenly we're Left Behind in a world without Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, and all the other self-proclaimed faithful... Well, doesn't that sound like a utopian paradise?